Pro what?

Good morning boys and girls, today I’m going to talk to you about propinquity!!

What is propinquity you might ask? Well, I’m glad you asked...

In social psychology, propinquity (from Latin propinquitas, nearness) is one of the main factors leading to interpersonal attraction. It refers to the physical or psychological proximity between people. Two people living on the same floor of a building, for example, have a higher propinquity than those living on different floors. Propinquity can mean physical proximity, a kinship between people, or a similarity in nature between things.

Basically, your environment has a direct effect on you as a person. You become what surrounds you because you are drawn to form similarities with the people that are closest to you.

A prime example is the workplace. If you work with a bunch of divorced, alcoholic, abusive scum-buckets you might form a social bond with these people. It is not to say that you yourself will follow the same path, but that you might sympathize with them and almost come to accept this behavior as normal. In other examples that are less extreme you may completely adopt similar characteristics. If you work with a group of people who are sarcastic and witty, they will rub off on you. Your sense of humor might shift and may ultimately find yourself associated with this type of person on a regular basis.

The workplace is obviously the most generic example of large sums of time spent within a group of people you did not choose to be around. There are other situations where this concept is found: the gym, the bar scene, your neighborhood, pretty much anywhere you interact with people.

After kinships are formed due to proximity, the next logical step would be to find a romantic relationship. Often these are formed with people who share similar interests. When two people have a high propinquity with each other it is natural to develop romantic feelings for each other.

This would be the example of the propinquity effect: the tendency for people to form friendships or romantic relationships with those whom they encounter often. In other words, relationships tend to be formed between those who have a high propinquity.

Why in the Hell am I talking about this? I think this is something people over look in their lives because it is not really a great conversation piece. Although, I think it should be included in possible New Years resolutions. Examine the people who contribute to your life in a positive way, and those who do not.

There is a certain portion a person must take responsibility for to better themselves. This would be the vast majority of all things concerning ones self. However, one should acknowledge that outside factors contribute to your well being. So in order to improve on yourself and your life it only makes sense to try and surround yourself with good, honest, caring people if that is what you strive to be. Depending on what your goals are in life will depend on whom you should look to for companionship. It’s like playing tennis with someone that sucks goat balls. You will never get any better if you keep smoking them. If you find someone to play with that challenges you then of course your game will improve.

For the most part Id like to think my family and friends are good, decent folk. There is of course exceptions of liars, backstabbers, nutcases, and leeches.

The goal is to weed these people out who are beyond help, or who do not believe they need it.

There is another concept that I have not been able to find much on anywhere, reverse-propinquity: the acknowledgement of your own influences on others around you. If you can see that you are doing nothing but harm to someone, then one should take the responsibility to remove themselves from the situation to better the other person.

I am not sure of what my goals are, what my major weaknesses are, or what I need to work on to better myself.

For the first time in a long time I feel I am a perfectly clean canvas.

"Around and around she goes, where she stops? Nobody knows"